like the time you told me you were honest and proved yourself wrong but you really believed it and i think you still believe it but i know it is not true and so does everyone else because i like to warn people about liars
and this reminds me of when amu abbas told me to write about i and not me and i thought i was being really deep but i think i may have missed a lot of what he was trying to get at, if not everything
but sometimes i was much more intelligent, i have decided, ten years ago than i am now.
boy cat is hungry
my throat hurts cause i smoked again and i should not
my wrist hurts just because it exists
dreams about ticketmaster screwing people over
dc this weekend/va this weekend
drive drive drive
and mommy and baba
how much clothes can i borrow?
here it is: i think i want to live in ny for one more year, then travel around and stay in different places, work odd jobs. i could live in ireland for up to 3 months. i could live in germany for a bit…maybe also 3 months. i could live in iran for as long as i want, i could live in california, utah, tennessee, oregon, va, md, dc…a backpack with some clothes, some books, and me. earn my keep. i am bound to nothing and no one, only myself. i am tired of living my life in terms of financial things. i can try to get a “i don’t have money” deferment on my loans, ’cause at the rate i am going, i won’t get a break for years and years, and i need not let this bread hit the floor george.
it is as i remember it. frightening and true. maybe another george wrote it. like o’brien as goldstein. maybe it is all lies to keep us sedated, to keep us thinking it is not what it could be, what they say it is. maybe not. maybe yes. maybe marky mark.
i ate delicious pizza on tuesday.
i do not like thinking about work outside of work.